Reasons Why People Hate Lawyers: The Halloween Edition

Reason number 1: They create online services like LegalZoom.com that take all of the fun out of Halloween parties. I got an email from LegalZoom containing the following paragraph:

Halloween Parties That Won't Have You Running from the Law
You've thought of everything for your Halloween party: the food, the booze, and the fun. But what about the potential legal liabilities?

I would laugh if it weren't so annoying.

We're Number 5!!!

This post has nothing to do with the entertainment industry, but it is entertaining. According to Forbes Magazine, Tonga (this blogger's native country) ranks number 5 out of the world's most corrupt countries. We tied Uzbekistan!

I'm not sure what the criteria were for this list, but what exactly do we need to do to beat Haiti next year?

Let's Vote Already

I'm ready to vote now. Totally electioned out. Anyone who hasn't decided who to vote for yet should be fined. I'm even sick of talk radio at this point. I would be listening to more music instead, but it's been a really slow new music season. Nothing exciting in new pop currently. I blame the AIG executives.

Cee-Lo Green: My Musical Comfort Food

I'm in a rather bad/sad mood right now. But, I just turned on VH1 and caught a quick earful of Cee-Lo singing at Hip Hop Honors. The nasally boom of his voice somehow sends the same electric signals to my brain as Mac & Cheese. Fascinating.

D'isapointed

I waited nearly a decade for this?? Come on, D'Angelo. You're telling me that the best you could pull off was a remake of YOUR OWN SONG FROM 1996? I give up.

Oh yeah, to give you some context, D'Angelo is back after 8 years with a (sort of) new single called "I Found My Smile Again," which is a remake of a song he released on the "Space Jam" soundtrack from 1996. He sounds good, but after 8 years my expectations were too high. It sounds better than any of Ne-Yo's shit, for example, but only on par with his own 2000 release, "Voodoo."

The Bobby Valentino Formula

I had a bad first impression of Bobby Valentino when he released "Slow Down" in '05. He struck me as off-key, average-singing, average-looking, and a lazy songwriter. But over the past 3 years, he has managed to charm me thrice:

1) Pimpin' All Over the World (2005): I figured this was just a fluke. Bobby only appeared in the hook, so I assumed I enjoyed this song in spite of him. I did notice the unusual yet sensible harmonies, and was confused to see Bobby Valentino mouthing the lyrics in the video.

2) Anonymous (2007): Smacked me in the face and called me Susan. The vocal harmonies, off-beat arrangement, combined with Timbaland's incredible production sound like the eye of a tornado if you're in a truck with a great sound system.

3) Mrs. Officer (2008): I came home very early one recent morning after pulling an all-nighter at a studio, and in the middle of my delirium I heard it: "Wee-oo-wee-oo-wee, Wee-oo-wee-oo-wee, Wee-oo-wee-oo-wee." I had no idea what this sound was, but it followed me to sleep that morning. A few weeks later, I heard this sound again behind an unmistakably Weezified voice identifying the source of this pleasure: "Bobby Valentino." The formula made sense: atypical vocal harmonies measured against very memorable refrains.

Bobby Valentino is inconsistent- often bland, but with flashes of promise. Let's hope these promises aren't empty.